• advent journal: kitchen question

    by  • December 3, 2013 • advent journal, food, grief • 10 Comments

    I have spent the evening

    baking, not writing.

    I have swirled my sadness

    into the mix of

    butter, sugar, eggs

    because I know

    what to do with

    butter, sugar, and eggs.

    Baking the same cookie

    doesn’t feel repetitive;

    why does writing

    about grief feel

    as though I am saying

    the same thing

    over and over and over?

    I think I’ll have a cookie.





    Blogging since December 2005


    10 Responses to advent journal: kitchen question

    1. December 4, 2013 at 12:29 am

      The ultimate comfort food. Sorry for your grief, Friend. God bless and keep.

    2. anita
      December 4, 2013 at 1:21 am

      More cooking than grieving in your life (correct?), thus you have more experience and are more comfortable there.

    3. Grace
      December 4, 2013 at 1:59 am

      “This is the kind of pain from which we don’t recover.” Mary Chapin Carpenter. And maybe we don’t want to recover. Incorporate is a better idea. Eventually there are tiny little moments where the grief is in your pocket, and you know you can pat it now and take it out to look at later. I promise. I have also started a few traditions to honor them. A little comfort is a good thing.

    4. heidireneeturner
      December 4, 2013 at 6:50 am

      the words will come when they’re ready, you’re not wasting time, you’re prepping, just like in cooking

      • December 6, 2013 at 8:33 am

        Thanks, Heidi.


    5. December 4, 2013 at 8:58 am

      The late Ali Farka Toure (guitarist from Mali) said that when he played, he smiled a lot because the music carried or transported him, just like the listener, and he was very content. Paraphrasing now, “…one cannot always feel that way, but just wait a little while, and one will get that feeling back.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DQMYqLrc7k

      • December 4, 2013 at 6:00 pm

        Thanks, Jeff.

        That’s the way cooking is for me.


    6. Leah
      December 4, 2013 at 11:56 am

      Aren’t we grateful for cookie breaks in the midst of Grief?
      I am.

    7. jenny
      December 8, 2013 at 12:59 pm

      I heard about your blog through a mutual friend late last summer; it was coincidentally at a time when I embarked on a journey overflowing with tremendous grief. Much of what you have shared at times resonates strongly with something I have felt in my grief, as well. I have appreciated that you continue to process your grief in writing. I identify with feeling repetitive in my journaling and processing, which is exactly why I find comfort in the fact that you continue to process yours and share it. Sometimes it is what you say that brings comfort, sometimes it is the fact that you are still saying it. Anyway, thanks for being open in this space.

      • December 8, 2013 at 8:41 pm

        Thanks, Jenny. It helps to share the journey.


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